If you have ever wondered whether to ask the "Are your children adopted?" question, check out this post from another blogger here.
Some points I thought were most interesting in the article and the comments:
- don't ask in front of the kids (both the author's & my personal feelings)
- a better way to ask is, "Are you an adoptive family?" (not singling out the child or children, but making a note that they are all part of a family put together by adoption)
- a better way to open the door to the conversation might be, "You have a beautiful family." This allows the person to respond in the way they feel most comfortable.
- for me, one of the most offensive things you can ask me, is "Where did you get them?" I hate that question because it is extremely personal to me and makes me feel like people think they are some commodity I picked up at the grocery store
Just as this blogger said, I know that it can be tough navigating what to say and not to say, especially if you are asking out of a desire to encourage the family in some way. Sometimes we, as adoptive parents, can scare people from saying anything at all because we do receive quite a few comments or get asked questions that are offensive. I think the best rule of thumb to follow is to think about if you were the family and it was your child, how would you want someone to start a conversation or ask a question of you?
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